Saturday, October 6, 2007

Perspective

Today we went to Salmon Days. It was nice because we got there right at the beginning and not a lot of people were there. Mason could watch fish for hours......I am not kidding. So much for ADHD. It is funny now because when we sit for a moment I find myself doing is looking at all the adults and asking myself, "Do they have cancer?" or "What hardships have they had?" This started with me when Grant and I couldn't have kids naturally. There was seven years of, "Why us?" We thought hardship was over when we had our two perfect babies by invitro - little did we know. Infertility actually set me up well for cancer. After fertility treatments, I became very accustomed to following directions, surrendering my schedule to the doctor's and treatment facilities, shutting up, and just doing as I am told. Seriously! My oncologist has mentioned a couple times that I am one of the best patients (in terms of following directions) that he has ever had. Yep, infertility taught me well. Truly, I am just thankful that they are there and I have good insurance. So, now, I look at everything differently and everyone. In high school and college, I thought I knew how things should be. I was so passionate about the right way to do everything. Now, I am soooooo much different. Part of it was age, part of it was experience, and part of it was realization of, "Who the heck cares what I think?" Anymore, I look at things three ways. First, does the action do harm to anyone? Is there collateral damage? If yes, don't do it. Second, never assume perspective - be kind. It is interesting how things happen. For example, I was cut in line the other day at a store. The woman said to me, "I am sick and have a doctor's appointment, so I need to cut in front of you." And she did. When I waited so long that I had to sit down, the clerk asked if I was okay and I told her that I was in chemotherapy. She was like, "And you let that woman cut????" I said, "Maybe her situation is worse." The clerk just looked at me with, "Yeah....worse....r-i-g-h-t..." Maybe she was, but the reality was I didn't have it in me to fight. Waiting was easier and kinder. And finally, does it make you and yours happy - truly happy? If yes, do it. That is it - the secrets to life. Now, go forth and be happy! I have to go drum.......yes, with Mason.......it makes us happy. Love, Ang

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

This was one time where a bald head and a wig would have come in handy, pull off the wig, expose your bald head and ask "you have problems?" But once again you are right, putting her down would only have made you feel bad, and that is not the goal in your life. Before a small plane pilot takes off he prforms what is known as a pre-flight check, where he looks the plane over to make sure it is airworthy. You have developed your life journey set of things you check each day the most important of which are loving your children and your family. I am proud to know you Clarno. Love pat&mag

Myrna said...

You know, Angie. One thing I know from this side of 60 (the far side) is that everyone, everyone has a story to tell. You are so right to look at that lady in line and give her a break. Who knows what might be going on. I'm so proud of you. You are one mature, loving, beautiful, wildly-drumming chick.
Love to you from us...Don & Myrna