Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Cyberknife DONE!

I graduated today at 11:15.  Now, I just wait.  I will get a scan in the next few months, but I really will not know the full success/fail until 8 months to a year from now.  The treatment went fine, however, I did get the side effects of fatigue and nauseous.  I forgot how tiring it was.  Plus, I was like, "I can do it! No problem!  Let's stop by Costco and Target and Fred Meyer....and frick I am tired....."  It is the kind of fatigue that you just do not care about anything.  Grant and I have managed to keep things going and the boys have been awesome, so I work for a couple hours and then I lay down.  Repeat.  Repeat.  Repeat.  The thing I can't stand is soccer practice.  It is a hour and a half......and Grant is with Mason at Baseball or Hockey.  Nolan is nine.....does he really need to practice for 90  minutes twice a week?  Whatever.  He loves his coach, so we do it but icky.  Also, now, because people are showing up late to games, the team is required to show up 1 hour before the game.  So, now, the same two players that showed up on time before, get to show up 30 minutes earlier and I just can do two hours plus travel right now - so I miss.  So who is being punished?

Anyways, I am fine.  The nausea should subside within two weeks and the fatigue in two months.  TWO MONTHS!  Frick.  The things you forget......

Layin' Low in the Valley....Happy Graduation Day from Cyberknife, Ang

Thursday, September 8, 2016

And life goes on....

So, for me, I have had good news.  For my boys, they have started school, riding their bikes, and doing so many "mature" things I have had to stop myself.  "Where did they get that?!?!  Why do they know that?!?!"  Moms talk to me and tell me, "Don't worry about "x", he will be fine.  He has Middle School figured out!"  Pause......wha?!?!.......he hasn't told me.....what the heck?!?!?!  So, then I ask them about their conversation with "X" and they pour out all this information that I had NO IDEA THEY HAD IN THEM.  I am starting to schedule treatment and I am trying to get it so that I will be home for the boys, but they are like, "Mom, we got this.  Do the treatment whenever they can get you in.  That is the most important."  Again, "Who are you?!?!"  I have been juggling treatment, your Dad's business, Grandma and pa, for years now.  When did you get so independent?!?!?!  OMG, you send one kid to Babysitting Class and he thinks he knows everything!?!?!?!?!

School is interesting now.  Things are so much better, but Nolan is experiencing growing pains.  Thank Goodness for the new principal and Nolan is like, "I am so happy there are announcements everyday, but they are done by the VP Monday -Thursday and then the Principal on Friday, but she talks A LOT!!!!"  I respond with, "Is that bad?"  "No, she is VERY INFORMATIVE."  Seriously, the kid kills me......

So, here is the thing.  I think I am the luckiest person in the world.  I could not have kids.....I have kids....albeit that Nolan complains about being frozen ALL THE TIME.  I got terminal cancer, and yet I am still here.  They are 11 and 9.  I wasn't supposed to see past 3 and 1.  Again, they are 11 and 9.  I actually like my doctors.  Seriously, I like them.  I know their histories, I know their struggles, I know what they like, I know what they do not like.....I like them and all the nurses and techs that go with them.  They actually ask about me.......hippa is a bitch, but most people say stuff like, "Well, I saw her here and she seems good!"  Hippa sucks.  Crap, I have a blog.  Really, say anything you want.

Finally, this is for my husband.   Twenty two years ago we made all sorts of promises.  I also remember the promises we made in Issaquah after the picnic when I would not see him until the ceremony.  We agreed on the vows, but we also said that evening, "If you get too fat to leave the bedroom, you can leave and if you cheat.  There was a third, but neither of us remember, so I guess that is okay.  So here goes.....

Grant, you have never left me.  Sometimes, I think I should have left myself.  If things were reversed, I may have left you.  I know you do not believe that, but sadly, you should.  We were young, and healthy.  You loved me like no one ever had.  You have loved me the same ever since.  You are my best friend, you are an amazing parent to my boys, and you have been, really, the only one I could have gone through all of this through.  Sometimes life sucks and there is, honestly, no one I would rather go through it with than you.  You have loved me and I have loved you.  I just hope that is enough.

Here is to treatment and more years, Ang

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Rocked it!

NĂºmero Uno!  Treatment starts next week!

Happy, Happy Wednesday, Ang

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Thank you, thank you, thank you....

First thank your all the thoughts, flowers, food, nail files (that one is actually super special and from HAWAII!), prayers and support.  It truly has been appreciated and, as always, humbling.  I have not left far from home except for one baseball game for the Tacoma Rainiers that we "won" tickets for at Mason's Hockey Association Auction.  We got a tour and photo too....like it?!?!

Anyway, the markers that have healed  have healed and there is nothing I can do about it now.  Other than a couple good knocks from Nolan I could have have been any more still for healing.  Tomorrow I go in to see if they healed in place and will work or if we need to go and put more markers in. Vote/Pray for number one. If it is number one, they will then start my treatment and set up my apppointments etc.

Go number 1!

Happy Tuesday,