So, this week.....

One of my boys actually got the top "pay for performance" allowance of $7 for the week.  Not hard....do your homework, do you chore and do whatever is asked of you or maybe even anticipate what is needed. (Yeah, that did not happen.)  The other got $5 - meets standards, but he raked and weeded my garden for $5, so he did well.  You guess which.....

My Dad called me to tell me Dairy Queen was giving away free cones on Monday.  (Donation of $1 required, but I gave more.)  So, proud.  He is also helping us get a free motorbike running, but we did clear his driveway and fix his fence from the "storm".  He was all bitter, "I can do it!!!!!"  "Dad, the boys wanted to help.  You have one tree branch down there still that is too big.  Hack, cut, chainsaw (yikes), to your delight. We just wanted to give you a head start."  "BAA HUMBUG....I can do it...."

Mason called me today totally distraught.  "I got a zero on my library project!"  I am like, "What do you need your trombone, lunch, or track shorts????"  "MOM!  I did everything I thought I was supposed to do and I got a zero....we all did......"  "Mason, what do you need from me?  Just to listen?"  "YES!"  "O-k-a-y."  "Blah blah blah....blah blah blah...blah blah blah."  "Mason, there has to be more to the story, Ms. Thomson is a reasonable woman.  There is NO WAY this is really happening.  Let's talk tonight, okay?  It will be okay.  I promise."  "Okay."  "I love you. Bye."  PAUSE..........I have just taken on all the feelings of my eldest son....No, I love you, thank you for listening, you are the greatest......just, "Okay.  Bye."  I prefer he say, "Yes, mummy, I love you, I understand and I get it.  We will talk later.  Taa taa!"  Maybe in my next life.  BTW - it was fine.  Ms. Thomson is a reasonable woman and Mason will be graded on what he did.  All is well.

My Mom wanted me to buy a 2 quart pot.  What am I going to do with that?  My boys eat a million calories a day.  For example, Mason has breakfast at home, his lunch from me for snack, buys lunch, comes home for snack, has a HUGE dinner, and then dessert.  He is a 12 slim.  I hate him sometimes.  I love my Mom, but sometimes...and then she said, "Well, I got one, so you can have it when I am dead."  LOVELY, that is great to think about....I can't win for losing.....

I was driving through the hood and there was this guy that was on the corner and mildly harassing pedestrians.  I was like, "Aren't you the guy that was naked on the street when I was trying to get Nolan to Soccer Practice?"  PAUSE.  Who says these things?!?!?!

I had to pull a 6th grade girl out of track practice and say, "I do not know what I did, or how I offended you, but seriously?!?!?!  I need you to follow protocol."  Her response, "I just had to go to the bathroom and I have not disrespected you ALL the time, just sometimes."  I looked at her and said, "Well, thanks for giving me sometimes, at least you are giving me that,  and tell me when you go to the restroom because at the track meet the bathroom is outside the gates and I am responsible for you.  There is no way I could tell your parents or guardians I lost you....do you get that?" Pause. "Yes."  "So, please?"  "Yes."  "Thank you.  Now, lets get back to fun...."  "Okay."  Frick.  Really?!?!!? The part that slays me is she is so talented...

And that doesn't even touch the school issues for next year...which THIS WEEK look better!

Happy Tuesday, Ang