Home for good

While I was packing everything up on Wednesday night and Thursday morning, it seemed like 15 years had past. I was so used to living out of a suitcase in my Mom's dining room and sleeping on the couch (the only place I was comfortable after surgery) with my boys upstairs with my parents. My Mom and I were discussing how much has happened. Two surgeries, three hospitalizations, countless doctor's appointment, chest tubes, etc. Also, there was the time period that I couldn't lay down by myself and someone would have to lower me and then I could change position because I had surgery on one side and a chest tube on the other. It was just less than a month ago. I absolutely have no concept that it is June 19th either. My friend at preschool asked me the date, and I literally had no idea. I guessed, and I was so wrong it was frightening. I guess in my mind it is still April and I have blocked the last two months out. As for me, I am doing well. I am off all the drugs, but take Alieve every once and a while. Coughing is okay now, sneezing can hurt, but it is burping and the hiccups that really get me. I think it is because I really don't know when they are coming. The pain in no longer in my back. It is in my sternum and it is slowly getting better. I can take deep breaths and that is really nice. I just have to do it s-l-o-w-l-y. I still can't lift Nolan. He is such a little trouper. He climbs up in the Explorer by himself and gets in his car seat so that I don't have to lift him. The boys were so excited last night to be moving home for good. Mason, of course, said he was going to miss everyone, but he was happy to be HOME. I am anxious to begin being normal and slowly I am getting there. I have already gotten the call that I need to do some therapy because of the PTS that goes along with a long treatment period (apparently, two years is the trigger for that). I am swimming in medical bills and explanations of benefits, but I am working through them, in addition, to doing my Grandma's medical bills from a fall in February. I am just thankful that we have such good insurance coverage Grandma and I. W are really lucky that way. I guess I am just really lucky all around. My last cleaning crew is coming on Saturday and the meals will stop next week. I will be normal again but NEVER NEVER the same. Enjoy the rain - it is washing the past two months right off of me. Love, Ang