Anyhoo, I digress...... but do I? This is my life now. As soon as the Fall Fundraiser is done, I am on to Box Tops even though Heather is doing it for me......then Spirit wear.....but I am doing Spirit wear for the Kinder school now.....my life is a....well.....blur. I find it funny when my friends say things like, "We are fundraising for a sign!" I am like, "We are fundraising so kids can go to Waskowitz. So that they have Scholastic Magazine. So that they can have a Science Night. So that they can have a shirt for their team." I have been up against PTAs with a budget of 150,000. We are at 20,000 of which I do 10,000 in coupons and trade. Do not get me wrong. I love my school - we just do things... well, differently. We also go with the program. Our parents rarely complain - we just, well, do it. I LOVE that.
Anyway, on to me, I am so boring, which I love, but I don't. I was suppose to have a scan on Friday, but I could not do it. Alana, my cousin, is having a candle party and I wanted to go. I know that sounds crazy, but one of my best friends wants to go with me. I never see Sherry and if I have a scan I will probably not go on Friday night. PLUS, Alana has offered to take my kids with her kids and hubby to dinner.....HUGE FOR MY KIDS. They LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, their cousins Nick and Joey and would do ANYTHING to go to dinner with them. So, my scan is on the 7th. Yes, am I worried. Yes, am I freaked out. Yes, I am a freak, but y'all knew that before. I am just trying to maintain. The last four weeks have included all that I mention but also two boys fevers of 103 plus, Grant's two colds and my "not feeling so good".
But here is the thing I want to say......this maybe be hard for some, so stay with me......maybe I was suppose to get terminal cancer. I don't get the term remission. Apparently, mine was too advanced and it is more likely than not to kill me. That said, I have to say it has calmed me a bit. I have perspective that I would have never had. Parenting alone gives you that, but maybe I needed more. Okay, so this is a shout out to my college roommates. They know me the best and have all the secrets of why I cannot ever run for public office, but did they even think I would be okay with having a small vacuum by my DRYER because there was so much sand from "Fishing at the river" that it went through the washing and ending up clogging the dryer. Okay, so the worst part of this is that I ACCEPTING THE SAND WAS CLEAN IN THE DRYER. Okay, so my college roommates are seeing my head spin around on my neck.....yeah, I agree. It has been an adjustment. I should send a picture, but I am not that good.
When I was first diagnosed, I was so mad at God for giving me kids that I cursed him. I was like, "Why give them to me and then make me die." Now, I know the answer. It was to make me fight. And now, that I have a whole "new level of chaos, dirt and paint touch up", I am ready for the journey, but the paint still bugs me......
I am proud of me, but it has been a journey. We all are. Bless everyone of us in our journey.
Happy Tuesday, Ang
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