Application sent...

Well, after a lot of hours, tons of edits (thank you Nanette, Laurie, Grant and Karissa!), the application was sent last night at 6:07 from the FedEx office by my house. I was going to wait and have Grant send it from his office, but I needed to do it. I needed to hand the application to the lady at FedEx, say a little prayer, and see it go. She probably thought I was a nut job, but I get that a lot these days and, quite frankly, don't really care anymore. On the way to FedEx, as throughout writing this application, I started to cry. I guess I am scared that now, my once semi-private battle with cancer, is now going to be judged and graded. Maybe my fight will not be strong enough and I won't get in and, therefore, I will let Bob down. Don't get me wrong, I know Bob is just happy that I applied. It is just the feeling of it. I also think about actually being chosen and the fact that I could become popular because of rectal cancer. Personally, I think I was pretty fabulous before my cancer, so being popular because of my cancer kind irks (sp) me a bit. Oh well, we will see. I hope that I do get it - for Bob and for me. Off to chemo, Ang