Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Summer and the bump....

Summer has really been amazing.  We bought a travel trailer - I know - we are "those" people now.  But see, I was always, "those" people.  I liked being those people. We purchased it in late June have have gone on two weekend trips and one full week trip since.  We have plans for Christmas and for Spring Break.  The boys love it.  I love it - but I have to say that is a VERY EXPENSIVE TOILET. And not one I am willing to give up.  Grant has all sorts of plans and so do I.  The boys just love their bunks, their storage, and the fact that I can prepare all their meals unlike road trips.  We store it at my parents and I have to say my Dad is super helpful with charging the batteries, filling the water, etc. He didn't like my first parking of the trailer claiming it was not straight.  I have done better since...apparently.  WHATEVER.  Basketball camp - DONE.  Lacrosse Camp - DONE. Neighborhood Garage Sale where the boys sold there stuff - I did a great job except for Nolan bringing home a six foot cut out of Homer Simpson with his earnings!!!!  OMG - help me!!!  And now, the boys are off to overnight camp this week and I was supposed to be on a sailboat somewhere near Desolation Sound about now, but that was not in the cards for me.  I first was concerned when they scheduled my scan...I was like, "....but if Keith and Deb go, that will be the week."  And, well, it was the week, but the alternator on the boat went out.  No Keith and Deb and sailing.  Then, I had another offer to do something fun and POW, that failed too.  Cancer scan still trumps.  I wanted to cancel it, but at my core, I knew I needed to go.  I was not scared.  I was terrified.  My cancer was back and I knew it.  I showed up late because of bizarre traffic, but we called and they knew.  I got there, did the scan, had tubes out of my arm for lunch and then to blood work.  I actually got to do blood work with, and I say this graciously because truly - I LOVE ALL OF THEM, my favorite nurse.  She is also the nurse that I was with when I tried to die.  The one that would not give me back my glasses because she was crying.  She blames the room....O-K-A-Y.  LOL!  We laughed I asked about her kids in complete detail and she was like, "OMG, how do you remember that?!?!?!"  Chemo/Shemo, you remember what you want.  Then, up to Hank.  NO RESULTS were in, but I had gone to the bathroom 47 times already.  The appointments were too close, but it is me and he makes calls, and they answer and they read the scan early because it is me and I am so loved.  Tumor, right left lobe.  One that we never worried about has grown 3cm in since March.  Other stuff - blah blah blah.  I say that because there is always blah, blah, blah, but my cancer had been gone for more than a year and now it is back.  Blah, Blah, Blah, is stuff I can deal with.  So, the phones start going, and the appointments start being scheduled.  We start with Cyberknife, then to ablation, trying to avoid chemo because my body is still recovering from chemo.  Hank said, "This is just a bump.  You know we will always have to monitor this.  Your tumors show up every once and a while."  I take off my glasses.  I cry a little, he hugs me and says, "If you don't have these, when will I see you?!?!?!"  I smile.  We hug again.  What would I do without him?  The journey continues.....bump.


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