Monday, September 19, 2011

Scan tomorrow

Nothing is "wrong", but this is my final clearance scan. I was supposed to do it right after my last treatment, but that was August and, remember, I took August off. So, when I called on August 30th to schedule, I could not get in until tomorrow, the 20th. Clearly, I have hit the "B" priority list. Sometimes that is a GOOD thing. Here is the problem.....you think you are handling everything so well, you are confident that you will have a clean scan, you have it all together, you are back and, then, like in my case, you can't find the dried dill weed that you JUST bought at the grocery store and you loose it. My cousin's son is dead, my chemo friend is BACK in chemo, I have another friend that is having major issues right now, and then, I have a scan and will I, once again, be a suck on the side of the earth? Yeah...I was a hot mess. Poor Grant didn't see it coming and I think really thought it was about dill weed. My evening ended reading to Nolan in bed and falling asleep with him. Man that kid moves a lot! I am better today, probably because I had no sleep and I haven't eaten a carb all day for prep, so I don't have the energy to be a hot mess. I will be okay either way - I am just scared. It is like PTSD....and it stinks! Love, Ang

3 comments:

Steve Chamberlin said...

Wow. This could totally explain why I've never bought dill weed.

I wouldn't worry too much about becoming a suck on the side of the earth. Mick Jagger could maybe pull it off, but I think you'll be okay.

That's cool that you got to hang with Nolan. Were you reading The Berenstains' B Book? "Big brown bear, blue bull, beautiful baboon blowing bubbles..." Good stuff for "B" listers with boys.

Now about your scan in a few hours. I know you're trying to be brave and all, but you're going to have to take this one lying down, Ang.

Then please come back to your blog and tell us all about it.

God bless and protect you all day tomorrow. (Oh, and God? Could you please help Angie find her dill weed?)

Mucho love, hugs, prayers, and crossed fingers for awesome results.

-Steve and Carla

Anonymous said...

Hi Ang, haven't talked to you ever so long. I have been keeping up with your blog and sending prayers heavenly every night. Went to my hair dresser yesterday and saw her new wig for the first time. I told her all about you and how much chemo you have endured, but never lost your hair (that beautiful head of hair). She is about to have her third treatment and will follow it up with 6 weeks of radiation on Oahu. She is doing well, but is anxious, to be expected. Her oldest son is at Kamehameha school on Oahu and it will give her some special bonding with him during the 6 weeks. Dayna is a very special person and has been added to my list of wonderful friends that occupy my prayer list. I would like to reduce that list, but for the time being, my wonderful friends need the prayers. Sending warm alohas and hugs to you all, Judi

auntie Jane said...

Fall is just starting to come around the corner here in North Carolina. I've been thinking about you and the boys and the fun you have in the fall at the pumpkin patch. I imagine you as Zena, Pumpkin Warrior Princess, catapulting pumpkins across the Kent sky...I can see the orange orbs, smell the scent of apples, hear the peals of laughter and feel the slight nip in the air. You'll be out there before you know it. Shoot a pumpkin for me. Love Jane