Monday, November 12, 2007

Apparently, I am not invincible

Well, rediation is going well and now I know it is working. I have felt tired, my nose has been bleeding since my last chemo treatmnet, Aunt Flo came to visit - so much for menopause due to chemotherapy, I am loosing feeling in my fingers and the bottoms of my feet, and I almost blacked out this morning. However, I was dumbfounded when I was told that we were going to hold off for a week to start oral chemo. I was like - I can do it, let's do it and my oncologist was like, "Let's talk Monday or Tuesday of next week. People need a break from this sometimes. Remember, we have been firing some heavy doses of chemo at you and with radiation this is fairly typical." He went on saying something like 80% of your platlets are in your pelvis....I stopped paying attention, so don't quote me on that one. "Fairly typical - I am not fairly typcial...." All I could think about is that I failed. So, I have spent most of the day trying to see the silver lining of "having a week off", but I am also mad that we just can keep gettin'er (sp) done! Oh well, this is for a reason. I am exhausted and I will take care of myself better this week, have other people run my errands, and sleep more. If I could just get Nolan on the new time schedule that would be great - 4:30am wake ups are brutal!!!!!!! Have a great week - Ang


leslie kendall said...

Hi Angie - Okay, here is the deal - call on me to help you with errands, child care, anything that you need - because if you don't, I will get Aunt Janie's email address and tell her move by move, blow by blow when you are washing cars - remember, I make a living going from mall to mall - so call me! Cell 425-327-7087 -
xoxoxoxo Leslie

Anonymous said...

Your disease is tenacious,(defined as tending to hold fast,
1 a : not easily pulled apart : COHESIVE : tending to adhere or cling especially to another substance persistent in maintaining or adhering to something VALUED). The disease is not unlike it's host, it is going to fight, and you Angela are fighting back. This thing is the toughest adversary you have ever known so forget your press clippings and quit guilt tripping over not getting a quick knock out over the thing. You have a great team of healers working to help you and you have all of us in your corner. Cut yourself some slack and take the slow steady course, remember the race does not always go to the swift, the tortise has its share of triumphs. love, pat&mag

Bob said...

Ang - If the doc says take it easy, it's for a good reason. I understand the "git'er done" attitude all too well, but have also learned that sometimes the gain returned from nearly wiping yourself out with treatment isn't really worth it. Like you, I'm more than willing to "take one for the team" if it will shorten my treatment period even a week. but sometimes, it just isn't worth it. Let this one go.
I'll be up in the treatment center on Thursday for my scheduled biweekly basting - stop by upstairs if you have time. I'll be on the 2nd floor from 9:30-10:30 and then upstairs for basting with the "nuclear option".

Anonymous said...

Hang in there, Ang. It's a marathon not a sprint, and you can't be the best at EVERYTHING! =) I am still confident that you will beat this.

Love you. you know the Larsen's are here if ever you need anything. Even tho I couldn't bribe my way onto that damn calendar of yours!

Anonymous said...

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Anonymous said...

"All I have seen teaches me to trust my Creator for all I have not seen."